Everything's Not Alright

Hi readers,

It's definitely been quite a while since I last wrote, but I'm back!

This last year I got a new job, got married, and bought a house! Now that things have settled down (sort of, lol), I have some time to catch up on poems.

This particular poem is one of the darkest I've ever written, and I believe I wrote it during a time where I was emotionally struggling. My past was never perfect, and one of the ways I coped was through writing poetry to express my thoughts, frustrations, sadness and despair. The process can be especially cathartic, and so here we are:


Everything's not alright
Darkness falls, light escapes
The night takes over with a vengeance.

Perfection's terrifying
Cracking like a mirror
Broken, in pieces, fallen
Destroyed, no hope for repair.

What happens next?
Heart's beating, mind racing
Thoughts of sadness, despair
Consume your head

Faster and faster it comes
Like a storm cloud filled with rain
Droplets fall, turn to hail,
Bigger, bigger

All consuming fear builds
Like an avalanche with a grudge
Growing, expanding, reaching new heights,
Shutting all of it out.

No, I'm not alright
No, I can't talk, I can't think,
Smiles non existent.
Tears, rage, anxiety amass.
Loneliness is my only friend.

Together we remain
Forever linked
No room for any more
We've become a two member club.
Private, our futures set
In stone, in sadness, in death.


Pretty alarming, but I feel as though it speaks to the real sadness and overwhelming sensation of not being or feeling enough. Like I am not enough, and I am not alright.

I hope that perhaps someone can read this and think of a time where they felt this lack of hope and realize we're all in this life together. Humans are connected through these types of experiences, and it takes writing and sharing to truly understand that concept. I eventually learned that, but sharing can be difficult and you may be hesitant.

I offer this poem as a beacon of hope and light in a world of darkness and despair.

Carry on, carry on.

-Vanessa